Fatherhood and Remembrance

Each generation seems to belittle the generation which follows. When they do this, they tend to be talking about other family's children or "kids these days..." followed by some negative comment on their work habits, ethics, child rearing or school work. In a country obsessed with labor saving gadgets, the grousing normally includes some comment to the effect that the rising generation has it easier than the one that went before... "well when I was in school..."
As a result you really have to question the credibility of the generation immediately preceding you as to their critique of your generation. Tom Brokaw may, or may not, have been correct in referring to the WWII generation as being the "Greatest." Sure they put America as number one with respect to just about everything: military might, economic clout, standard of living, health care etc. etc. Sure during this generation we have only been able to hold on to that first place in military might and economic clout (the second is quickly headed for shaky ground), but they were not called upon to fight a morally questionable war in a country few knew anything about (Viet Nam.) They also voted themselves the best retirement security this nation had ever seen. In addition, WWII had driven every other highly developed industrialized planet to their knees. Except for Pearl Harbor, America was basically unscathed at home. So business wise, you really had to do a lousy job not to succeed -- now you have to do one heck of a job to just survive.

Frequently, in the grousing by the WWII generation, you find negative comments about the parenting ability of the Viet Nam generation. But I believe there might be grounds to call them on that issue. I give you one simple anecdotal example. My children who are now mostly grown and through college or grad school, all participated in track and cross-country in high school. I followed my Father's example and attended nearly all of their meets at home or away. I also ran track and cross country. "When I was in high school and junior high..." hardly anyone showed up for our home or away track meets. Other than team members and coaching staff, the only other spectators were my parents and my dog -- and sometimes the dog didn't make it. When I watched my children participate, there were a huge number of parents at such meets. So how does that compute into bad parenting?

Sometimes they complain about drugs. That is one complaint that my generation has no real grounds to criticize their kids generation, and probably not the extramarital sex issue either. But I suspect our parents had some legitimate gripes on that point, except...have you ever watched General Eisenhower in any of the film clips during WWII? He is almost never without a cigarette in hand. I remember if you opened the door to the teacher's lounge at my high school, a huge cloud of billowing cigarette smoke would blossom out into the school. It also seems like that generation had something of a little alcohol problem as well.
Looking at my children and their friends, I just cannot help being impressed. They know how to do so much more than we did. So when it comes to being a father, I tend not to knock the Iraq war generation. But contrary to what I have said before, I have to nod in some respects to my Father having been an amazing person. He only graduated from high school, but he was one of the first in his home county to learn to and drive a motor vehicle. He could sell about anything to anyone. While he was not a strong advocate of organized religion and basically detested professional ministers, there was still some kind of spirituality about him that I cannot quite put into words.

While my father had most of the prejudices prevalent in the Great Lakes region at the time, when the local KKK started persecuting Catholics (because there weren't really any racial minorities to persecute), he helped try to shelter them from the storm. When Merchants got outraged at the Gypsies when they came around, he made friends with their King. He may not have been a big supporter of the United Way and other organized charities, but he quietly took care of neighbors in need. And, probably most important of all -- he provided, took care of, and encouraged his children in their activities. It didn't matter to him if we sat the bench at team sport competitions, he came anyway. When he thought an important extracurricular group was not getting sufficient attention from the school (4H, Cross-Country, etc.) -- well he made sure himself that they got rewarded for their efforts himself. If at a 4H or FFA auction it appeared to him that kids were being penalized at the auction and judging not because of the efforts they put in, but rather the quality of animal they could afford to start with -- well, let's just say there were a lot steers who commanded a higher price than the Grand Champions at the local county fair.

While he may not have been impressed with the hippie generation, or the anti-war demonstrations during Viet Nam, he understood that all wars were not equal and in that respect our generation got short changed. He also knew that we should not be sending my generation into harm's way because of some domino theory.

So while I may not be all that impressed with my Father's generation, I was and always will be impressed with my Father.